Garri Again? To The Internet Friends I Have Not Met

No sugar, Just water.

Garri Again?

Inflation - the gradual rise in the price of goods and services and a fall in the purchasing value of money.

It’s safe to say there is no more need for introductions, but it never hurts to say, “hello, once again.”

If anything kills Emefiele, it will be overprinting money.

Now, I have a question to ask. Are you guys truly drinking Garri as much as I think you guys are or am I too entrenched in trenches WhatsApp?

People say I write way too much depressing stuff, but it’s not my fault. For every day I wake up in this country, I wake up more depressed and more pissed than the previous day. I hate to admit, for me especially, the only joy I feel these days comes from those random bursts of happiness where I don’t know why I am happy and at the same time, those bursts of happiness vanish as fast as they come.

By the way, what's so funny about a 17.71 percent inflation rate. That figure is probably underreported knowing my motherland. I never listened much in Economics class but I was not dumb either. From the look of things, even Adam Smith might not be able to save us from this ongoing economic suicide trend.

Our news media is currently saturated with news of inflation and according to the numbers presented, we are presently experiencing galloping inflation(10-20% inflation rate). Our galloping inflation also has the characteristics of hyperinflation(50%upwards). Hyperinflation happens when the central bank prints money to fund a war and when there is no rise in the production of goods and services. In our case, we are printing money to pay debt and other things you will not hear from me. I'm my mother's only child. Abeg o!

Back to the matter of Garri. I see people post about drinking Garri every day and I just ignore it thinking people cannot be drinking Garri this much. But it has gotten to a stage where it has become impossible to ignore. I see like three to five of these posts on a daily and it is bothersome. Ah!

I know things are bad. Like really bad. And at the same time, we may not all be rich, but it is easy to live in our fading middle-class bubble and be oblivious to the realities of others. What is the worst thing you can think of? Someone you know is probably going through it. What is the worst meal you can think of? That meal is what is keeping people from going to bed on an empty stomach. All in all, be kind.

Anyways, what am I saying? You guys should go easy on the Garri. When we eventually make the sort of money we all want, how will we see each other if your vision is all messed up?

Once again, if anything kills Emefiele, It is going to be overprinting money. Yeah! I have a personal beef with him.

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To The Internet Friends I have Not Met.

An ode to the internet friend I have not met

I know you read ten books in a week

And you say I can ask you about anything

But are you truly an open book?

An ode to the internet friend I have not met

We talk about financial freedom and responsibility all the time

But how come you are in debt with all the telecommunication networks

Financial freedom and financial irresponsibility do not mix. Fix up!

An ode to the internet friend I have not met

We might not get to sleep with Lana Del Rey

But a man and a woman can dream

After all, hope is a dangerous thing for a woman and man like us to have - but we have it.

An ode to the internet friend I have not met

To be honest, you cannot sleep with everyone

Take it easy…

Before you catch something that does not have a name.

To the internet friend I have not met

Stop saying you miss me all the time

How do you miss me when I am currently talking to you?

Go easy on the ogogoro.

To the internet friends I have not met.

We deserve to ball

And ball we shall

Hopefully, we don’t have to sell our kidneys to achieve that.

I know life is presently playing bad cop

And in the process, leaving us physically, mentally, emotionally, and financially scarred

Just so you know, there is light in the middle of the tunnel (I have no business with the end of the tunnel)

And whatever happens, I love you like a fat kid loves cake. ( This is not intended to be fatphobic, and if you think it is, I apologize in advance)

Adios! Let me leave you with my favorite songs and quotes.

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Music

Nina Simone - Sugar In My Bowl

Everybody Loves An Outlaw - I See Red

Quotes

Until death, it is all life - Miguel De Cervantes, Don Quixote

There is no book so bad that it does not have something good in it - Miguel De Cervantes, Don Quixote

There were no embraces because where there is great love, there is little display of it - Miguel De Cervantes, Don Quixote.

Adios! Di’ra o!!!